Broken Compass

Daddy….When you passed, my compass broke
No one can understand the handkerchief soak
When I looked into your kaleidoscope eyes I could see…. beginning, center and end
Now I suffer darkness longing for your approving stare….

THE EULOUGY – April 1, 2006

A Tribute To Our Father
Brother Bilal N. El-Amin

Takber, Takber, Takber, Takber (Praise GOD)


When I think of my father, I think of a human being who is kind, loving, funny and overall a joy to be around. Many people I have spoken with over the last couple of months have remarked that he has been impactful and generally a wonderful addition to their lives. For instance, the Hall family no longer eats pork at family gatherings; many now see aluminum cans, Pepsi and cigarette UPCs as valuable resources to acquire logo branded goods. Most of all, Daddy would proclaim loudly and proudly of the goodness and mercy of Allah.


My father persevered through many challenges in life. As our father struggled with the plight of cancer he complained very little about the discomfort of the disease. Whether it was the doctors’ visits in the middle of his workweek, the profuse sweating, swollen lymph nodes, or the general uncertainty of the disease. Though an extremely intelligent and wise man he never graced the halls of college, but he insisted his children get as much quality education as possible. In his mid-twenties he was challenged with the responsibility of four young children. He struggled between being a mediocre Muslim or a committed Muslim. My father was committed to Al-Islam because he saw it as a way to become free from mental and spiritual slavery and as a way to keep his soul as he persevered.


I remember sleepless nights. I would call him at all hours of the night to discuss at great length topics of politics, war, religion, love, philosophy, to name a few. I will miss this good-natured banter for no one could converse with such zeal and passion and yet leave another feeling as if their contribution was indeed meaningful.

My father enjoyed being a parent. He was a true provider, mentor, and friend. Of course, we all had our bouts with Baba, but now I see his sternness was to make us logical, steadfast in our belief for Allah, independent and morally strong.

My father was a great humanitarian. He enjoyed meeting Muslim brothers and sisters from around the world. He enjoyed speaking with man or woman, young or old. It is in this spirit of love that I conclude. My father deeply loved people. I call it ‘Uncontrollable Love’. Love so special that when one thinks of him they smile, laugh or cry. Love so special that he would humble himself for the service of others. Love so strong for Allah he would scream ‘Allah is the Greatest’ without concern of persecution.

He recently said to me, “ One should not play at love.” I understood this to mean that in the process of playing at love one is deceiving another into believing that ones relationship is something it is not.

All in all, as family, friends, brothers and sisters in humanity we must love uncontrollably because the true extent of your essence is measured by the exhibition of love that one shows for Allah’s creation.

Many of you have admittedly said that Brother Bilal was your best friend. (For a moment I was offended because I thought I was special). My father made everyone feel special because of the love and relationship he has with Allah who is the supreme, the oft merciful, and the enlightenment. He could then easily spread feelings of goodwill to others.

We will miss our father dearly, but Allah truly knows best. O’ Allah forgive him for his sins and grant him entrance into the gates of paradise!

Takber, Takber, Takber, Takber (Praise GOD)


~ by Abeni El-Amin on November 29, 2010.

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